How to Shave

(Why Presbypoet should not shave.)

Instructions:
Notice beard needs cutting.
Stand at bathroom sink.
Open medicine chest.
Take out shaver.

Hold electric shaver in hand.
Plug it in.
Forget to take off plastic cover.
Turn on Shaver.

Start to shave.
Realize it is impossible to shave
with plastic shield on.
Do not turn off shaver.

Pull off plastic shield.
It did not go alone.
In removing the shield
I hit a button that opens the cover.

The metal top sprang up.
Three spinning heads now exposed
moving at rapid speed
flung themselves out into space.

As I said before:
I was standing over the sink.
Gravity sent them to the lowest part of the sink.
Whence they disappeared down the open drain.

That is why when my wife came home
and found me dismantling the sink
I explained to her.
I was just shaving.

My latest Rube Goldberg invention.
© Presbypoet, August 25, 2005


True story.